Wednesday, May 6, 2009

Who Killed My Daughter by Lois Duncan


This is the story of a mother's search for the truth behind her daughter's death and shows how she was able to uncover information that the police could not.In one sentence you get an idea of what the book is about but truthfully this book is really about a mother's love for her daughter,the journey she took to find her killers,a process of healing,an idea that if she could not control the circumstances leading to her daughter's death then she could try and control what happens afterwards.A tragic journey into the mind of a parent who loses a child,an insight of what every parent most dreads.

I got the distinct feeling that Lois Duncan wrote this book as a letter to her daughter,to let her know wherever she is that her mother loved her.That her time on this earth was precious and she will be in her mother's heart now and forever.

I chose this book to review because of what happened today.My daughter did not go to school today as she has an ear infection.I had to go to work and left her at home alone.At about midday I saw there was a missed call from her on my cell.I tried calling back and no answer on the landline and no answer on her two other cell numbers.I started panicking and immediately as I was driving back home I had these thoughts on how I was going to perform CPR and call the ambulance at the same time and worrying that they were going to ask me to spell out my street address as this happens every time and wondering why people that sell houses never make this a selling point,as in, your street name is David Street,you will never have to spell it out when you order take outs,ever.I called a friend and said they must be on stand by so that if I miss called,he is to call the ambulance right way.As I screeched to a halt in front of my house she finally answered the phone,I burst out crying,she told me she had been in the bath and then called me a "retard" for being so emotional.My daughter,my angel,my reason for living!!

Back to this wonderful book by Lois Duncan,this courageous mother who decided to take action and do something,anything.My heart goes out to her.She wrote this book in such an open way,and totally bares her feelings for all to see.The writing itself was so easy to read and follow despite the painful content.The story leaves a lot of unanswered questions but the investigation by this mom raised a lot of questions which might never have arisen were it not for her.Some questions are answered,some not.Quite a few unresolved issues but I would not have missed reading this book for the world.

The most tragic for me is when she explores in hindsight what she could have done to prevent what happened.Could she have insisted Kaitlyn not go out?So many little things she could have changed if only she could have foreseen the future.Guilt she will live with forever.No human being should have to shoulder pain like this for a lifetime.

Basically this was a book about a mother's love for her child,a love letter,a final journey she took with her daughter,putting her own mind to rest,gaining some peace,an apology "I couldn't protect you".I have always loved you and will always love you.

I feel priveleged to have read this book.I read it in May 2007.For South African readers who would like to know more about this book please use this link for Kalahari Books or if you would like to read some more reviews on this amazing book then use the Amazon link below.
Who Killed My Daughter?
There are no photographs in this book but the front cover was all I needed.The way Lois Duncan wrote this book was enough for me to be able to visualize all I need to know.

12 comments:

  1. What a wonderful review! (As always!) And I will have to put this on my list. I hope writing the book gave Lois Duncan a little bit of solace. AND I'm so glad your daughter was OK! Someday she'll understand!

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  2. Thanks Suzanne.And you're right about Shannon.She would like to have triplet boys one day,imagine!

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  5. Jack & Kajal
    I come from South Africa and basically any books that I buy get too expensive once they need to be shipped over here.I will have a look though and see how they compare.Thanks

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  6. Yvette, that was a great story about your daughter and made your whole review of the book so powerful. Where kids and daughters are concerned I know exactly how you felt/feel, and your daughters response, that is exactly how mine would have reacted. It is amazing how cathartic writing is. I don't normally read much true crime, Im afraid it would make me more afraid of bad stuff happening, does it leave you feeling unsettled or better for knowing what is the worst that people can do? That was a great review, you have got me interested in crime reading and as I said it isn't what I normally read.

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  7. To Book pusher
    (I couldn't find your name anywhere on your blog)
    I love reading these books because they are true and I use them to try and find parallels with my own life and try to prevent maybe the same things happening to me.Strangely enough I am now reading Because You Loved Me by M William Phelps which is about a daughter who helps her boyfriend to kill her own mother.All I have managed to work out so far is whatever you do,don't allow your daughter to get into a situation where she would consummate a relationship so early in life.Once done,and in this case,with a manipulative mentally unstable boy,it can escalate into something like this.I find it so hard to find a balance between understanding (and remembering) what it feels like to be a teenager and also trying to have rules which directly impact on the former.At the end of every day I sigh "by the grace of God..."
    That's the good thing bout crime books I am constantly aware of what can go wrong,the bad thing is worrying about everything that can go wrong.As you start reading them you can tell which storylines are going to be disturbing.For me as a Mom,stories of mothers murdering their children is terrible for me.I still have to read the Andrea Yates book where this mother drowned her 5 children.I also heard that the oldest one actually managed to run away and she grabbed him.They are now saying she was insane.My only thought was if you are going to drown all of them,should you not have a bit of mercy and drown the older ones first who can understand what you are doing to the others.Why torture the child as well?I dont care if she is insane or had the blues,I feel for the children and I hope she rots in hell.

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  8. Great Review!

    Finally got to the Library to look for some books. Put a couple on hold that you suggested. There were a few authors though that they don't have which really suprised me. But I know that if I really want one I can have them request it from another library.

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  9. Hi Jenny
    Which ones are you struggling to find?Please let me know

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  10. Another interesting review. I liked the story you included about you and your daughter. How scary for you.

    I'll have to agree with you on Andrea Yates.

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  11. Sharon I am so glad it ended well for us.I get so paranoid here in SA especially with the high crime rate.We are behind bars(around our yards and on our windows) and have alarm systems and security guards patrolling the perimeter and yet about a month back 4 houses from us,a man broke into a house and the building team there shot him dead.What worries us is why a bunch of builders would have a gun in the first place,And we have noticed that more homes get burgled when there is building going on in the suburb.

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  12. awsome review! i read the book and it was very interesting and showed how much a mother can love her daughter.

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